You ain't gonna believe this. I went into the market today, and who do I see but Dickie Jensen dressed in a white dress shirt with black tie, black pants, and black shoes. He was clutching a Bible and wearing a stupid fake goatee just like Junior had this morning. He stops me and asks if I have accepted Jesus Christ as my personal saviour. Before I can answer, he introduces himself as Dickie's identical twin brother Matthew. I swear this town is finally coming unhinged.
Getting out my tin foil hat,
Stevie Joe Parker
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