Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Stevie Joe's Local Entertainment

One of the things that is so great about living in Junebug Holler is that there is free entertainment around every corner. Whether it is Dickie Jensen running nekkid through a party or Junior trying to use the computer over at Prudy's. One of my favorite local acts is Junebug Holler's long-time chief executive, Mayor Barney.

Despite the stories you might hear me tell about our little town, there are some smart folks here. It's just that the smart folks are smart enough to stay out of local politics. They know that being in office is like hitting yourself in the head with a hammer and asking permission to do it again. So, the people who do run for office are not the brightest bulbs in the marquee. A prime example of this phenomenon is Mayor Barney.

That is not to say, however, that Mayor Barney is actually as dumb as he looks. There has been some speculation that he avoids trouble, and prosecution, by hiding behind a veneer of stupidity. All I can say is that if he's acting, he should get a damn Oscar®.

The other day I ran into Mayor Barney down at "Mudslide Estates." This is what I like to call the small collection of residential lots that he's been trying to sell. They overlook a ravine created by the drainage tile from the farm across the street. Water runs off the farm, through Mayor Barney's property, and down to the creek. The ravine gets bigger by the year, hence the name.

During my recent visit, I happened to notice a large PVC pipe down in the bottom of that ravine, and Mayor Barney was in the process of covering it up with truckloads of dirt. It seems that he was filling in that ravine and moving the drainage problem to the next property owner down the line.

Knowing Mayor Barney, it is a sure bet that this will end in disaster. Years ago, I was foolish enough to try to talk sense into folks so they can avoid problems like this. I've since grown wiser and learned that it's best just to sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. I'll let you know how it goes.

Your reporter on the scene,
Stevie Joe Parker

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